Marriage Relationship for the Engaged Couple
Bloom, L., & Bloom. C. (2004). 101 things I wish I knew when I got married. Novato, CA: New World Library. The Blooms emphasize the importance of learning to live with differences. Conflicts can be a source of growth in marriage. Couples need to work toward win-win solutions to problems.
Chapman, G. (2010). The 5 Love Languages: The secret to love that lasts. Chicago: Northfield Publishers.Describes how people communicate love in different ways and shows the wonderful things that happen when men and women learn to speak each other’s language. Chapman has written numerous books about love languages. There are versions for men, children, and teenagers.
Dobson, J. (2004). Love for a lifetime: Building a marriage that will go the distance. Colorado Springs, Co: Multnomah Gifts. For those who are newly engaged, recently wed, or nearing their 10th wedding anniversary, this book offers guidance on building a marriage that will stand the test of time. His short, easy-to-read book encourages couples to keep Christ in the center of their relationship, see eye to eye on the big things, and be prepared to get into big fights about the little things. This book illustrates how men and women think differently.
Feldhahn, S. & Feldhahn, J. (2006). For men only: A straightforward guide to the inner lives of women. Colorado Springs, CO: WaterBrook Multnomah Publishers. The Feldhahns use a national scientific survey and hundreds of interviews to explain what you can do to improve your relationship. Six insights about women that help bridge the gender gap. A Quick Start Guide is provided for impatient readers.
Feldhahn, S. & Feldhahn, J. (2004). For women only: What you need to know about the inner lives of men. Colorado Springs, CO: WaterBrook Multnomah Publishers. The Feldhahns use a national scientific survey and hundreds of interviews to explain what you can do to improve your relationship. Seven revelations about the inner lives of men will help you understand and may bring harmony to your marriage.
Garascia, A. (2002). Getting married, living together: A guide for engaged couples, Notre Dame, IN: Ave Maria Press. Written in sensitive, yet straightforward language, this book provides an insightful examination of common assumptions and misconceptions about living together. This book reviews potential problems and offers positive steps couples can take toward a happy, enduring, and sacred union.
Goddard, H. W. & Marshall, J.P. (2010). The marriage garden. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass Books. The premise of this book is that our marital relationship needs nurturing just as a garden does. It is the simple, everyday acts of kindness that keep our relationship healthy. Many suggestions are provided for growing our relationship. Perhaps one of the most
important is focusing on the positive rather than the negative aspects of our marriage.
Harley, W. F. (2001). Fall in love, stay in love. Grand Rapids, MI: Revell. Discusses how spouses should meet each others’ needs to have a happy marriage. They also need to avoid “Love Busters” which can harm a relationship. Similar to The 5 Love Languages.
McManus, M., & McManus, H. (2008). Living together: Myths, risks, & answers. New York: Howard Books. A research-based look at cohabitation. Twelve myths are discussed and refuted using statistical, scriptural and logical arguments. The emphasis is on traditional marriage.
Parrott, L., & Parrott, L. (2006). Saving your marriage before it starts: Seven questions to ask before and after you marry. Grand Rapids, MI : Zondervan. This marriage preparation resource lists “ingredients” of a happy marriage and then translates these ingredients into seven questions. Couples learn whether they have faced the myths of marriage with honesty, identified their love style, developed the habit of happiness, and say what they mean and understand what they hear. Couples also discover whether they have bridged the gender gap, know how to fight a good fight, and whether they are each other’s soul mate.
Parrott, L., & Parrott, L. (2001). Saving your second marriage before it starts, Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, Second marriages with children are twice as likely to end in divorce as remarriages without. Studies have shown that it takes two to seven years to adapt to being a step family. This book addresses the unique issues of “pre-marital families” and offers wisdom to prepare couples for what lies ahead. Couples learn to tackle challenges with faith, perseverance, and hope.
Petitfils, R. (2010). What I wish someone had told me about the first five years of marriage. Cincinnati, OH: St. Anthony Messenger Press. Couples make many major decisions during their first five years of marriage: lifestyle, finances, careers, and children. If individual goals and values differ, conflict may result. Petitfils stresses the importance of setting priorities. A unique chapter deals with illness, and includes a section on coping with a miscarriage.
Thomas, J. L., & Thomas, D.M. Beginning your marriage. 9th ed. (2002). Chicago: ACTA Publishers. A resource for couples in the first years of marriage, when the rosy optimism of courtship and wedding are tempered by the reality of two people learning to negotiate daily life together. This book applies to all faiths and has a chapter on interfaith marriages and the discussion that needs to take place to help buffer some of the obstacles to come.